My intention for this website is to post something weekly. Tapas, or discipline, is my on-going personal work. Working for myself in a lot of ways is not glamorous and the constant updating of social media is not my cup of golden milk. So, sometimes I take a step back and have a break. Someday soon I'll hire a social media strategist who can shine in this area so I can shine in my little cocoon of self-care musings and working with clients. And so, alas, here is a late blog post.
There's a saying in the wellness world about the Universe trying to get our attention. It first begins with a little knock, a little intuition or feeling we might have, but ignore. Then it may progress to a louder knock, or a deeper, unshakable feeling that we still somehow choose to ignore. And then it's even louder, banging, aching to be heard, "hello?! IM OVER HERE JUST OPEN THE FREAKING DOOR AND I'LL PROVIDE YOU WITH WHAT YOU'RE ASKING FOR." And still we don't listen. We come up with excuses about why we shouldn't open the door.
Until finally, the Universe takes the door down and hits you over the head with a 2x4 to get your attention, and we are forced to. An example might be that you are ignoring the cues from your body that you need rest. The Universe 2x4 is delivered in the form of a broken leg. You are forced to rest! The 2x4 is always pretty extreme and cannot be ignored.
My 2x4 happened just yesterday. I was about to teach a yoga class in a studio at an old mill as I have done for a couple years. There was an old wooden ladder behind the door as it has been for a while. I went to close the door before class, turned around, and the next thing I know the ladder fell on top of me and hit my head. WHABAM. A literal 2x4, straight to the head.
Adrenaline was up. I felt a responsibility to my students to teach anyway, and I thought I could use some deep breathing myself. So the show went on. Afterward, I felt so loopy and I wasn't sure if it was because my head was hit or all the pranayama we did. It took me a while to sit and collect myself, and the best way I could describe how I was feeling was drunk and maybe high. In a strange way, I felt totally relaxed, but out of my own mind. Like I shouldn't be driving, and I was moving slow.
I ended up at the hospital to be sure nothing more serious took place. I received a cat scan and slept for a long time and only started to feel a little less drunk, but still drunk nonetheless.
It was deemed a concussion. The doctors recommendation? Avoid screens (TV, computer, cell phone) and eat meals silently. I thought, oh my gosh, this is what I try to teach my clients to do on a daily basis! I was so happy for this recommendation from a Western Doctor, and yet, I was also saddened that this advice is only shelled out after a head injury! I also added some apple pie to my doctors orders, because it's so grounding and I need some of that!
It's been a big week. My boyfriend's sister was married, I got sick, received a concussion, missed some work, and we are moving! WHAT.
The Universe is trying to get my attention. It's forcing me to pause and stop and collect myself, and it's also giving me the gift of time. Time to re-establish home.
And so, I leave you with this plain old blog post, recounting my story, in the hopes that you will listen to the knock the first time, and not need to receive a Universe 2x4.
In health and harmony,